If you spend any time in worldly conversation, you’ll notice
that the vast majority of dialogue doesn’t matter. Maybe they’re about sports,
or the weather, or hobbies, but they have no real value in any lasting sense.
Yet, there continues to be an appetite for “organic” counseling and
conversation, where the hope is we’ll land on something valuable on accident,
or as the relationship progresses.
I was in the Middle East some years ago (pre-GPS) and we got
lost near dark. The driver panicked and started taking random turns. We finally
got him to pull over and we tried to figure out where we were. We couldn’t
backtrack because of the randomness and roundabouts, and as the sun set we lost
all sense of direction. Fortunately, we found one landmark that allowed us to
figure out where we were, and that allowed us to use our maps to get to our
destination.
How many conversations have you had that just followed the
random twists and turns? Have you ever been in a conversation and asked, “How
in the world did we get here?” A chaplain should always be steering the
conversation and have a destination in mind; otherwise, how are you ever going
to get somewhere good? I love how Hershael York puts it,
I really don’t want anybody to be
around me 15 minutes without knowing the two loves of my life—the Lord Jesus
and [my wife].
The real goal is making it feel like an organic conversation
that lands on eternal truths; taking some scenic turns and byways, always
knowing where you’re trying to end-up with a plan on how to get there. I love
hiking with the kids and popping out at the parking lot when they thought they
still had miles to go. What a coincidence? Or was it dad with a GPS, a trail
map, and an agenda?
Take control of the conversation, and remember what Heath
Lambert says,
Counseling is either discipleship
or evangelism.
How are you going to get to Jesus? What questions will make
the person you’re talking to think about eternity? I ended a gospel
presentation (outside of chaplaincy) with someone recently and they said, “You
really made me mad!” It wasn’t my goal to make them mad, and I would have
preferred instant joy in them, but I rejoice that now the Holy Spirit has a
seed planted in their heart which he can grow.
In a future article we’ll talk about making sure we share
the truth in love, not with the end goal of making people mad.
Key Verse: For this purpose I was born and for this
purpose I have come into the world—to bear witness to the truth. ~ John 18:37
More:
1. What did Paul mean when he said, “I endeavored to know
nothing among you except for Christ and him crucified.” (1 Corinthians
2:2)? Can you say the same?
2. If faith comes by hearing, and hearing the word of
Christ, who have you told?
3. Think back to a time when someone got right to the point
with you: did that annoy you, or do you appreciate that person?
4. Further Resources:
Mohler, R. Albert. The Conviction to Lead: 25
Principles for Leadership That Matters. Bloomington: Bethany House, 2012.
York, Hershael. Pastor Well. Podcast. Louisville, KY: The
Southern Baptist Theological Seminary. https://equip.sbts.edu/collections/pastor-well-hershael-york/
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