Introduction - Hope in the Loss of a Baby

 

Introduction

Instant Heaven. ~ John MacArthur

“Instant heaven,” John MacArthur said to Larry King in response to a question about what happened to the babies who died onboard the airplanes in the September 11, 2001 terrorist attacks. That simple answer is accurate, so let me reiterate: babies who die are assured heaven. But it’s an answer made for a fast-paced television interview and there is so much more to that answer.

MacArthur would later write Safe in the Arms of God to expand on his answer. James White wrote Grieving, Your Path Back to Peace after a colleague lost a granddaughter. Ashley Opliger looks at it from a perspective I can’t imagine—that of the mother—in Cradled in Hope, as does Jackie Gibson in You Are Still a Mother. All of those books and others are excellent resources to find hope in the loss of a baby. So why am I writing another?

As I’ve spent twenty years wrestling with this topic, and having officiated too many funerals with tiny caskets, hosted too many memorials with inconsolable parents, and sat and prayed with my wife in doctor’s offices as the doctor confirmed the worst, I’ve realized that the Bible spends a great deal of time on this topic with solid and faith building answers pointing to the glory of God. As I’ve read other books, I’ve longed for a deeper answer to why babies die, and what God’s purposes might be.

For Parents

The purpose of this book is to bring hope to those grieving the loss of a baby. The goal is not to preach these babies into heaven. I’m sure they do not need this book; their faith has already become sight. I’m sure babies who die—regardless of ethnicity, location, or parent’s faith—go straight to heaven. But the bereaved left behind need answers—even when the answers are hard—because the answers are full of hope.

The hardest truth in the loss of a baby or infant is that for some families it is the catalyst to lead them to Christ, and for others it will harden them against God and will increase their bitterness and despair. This book is pastoral, meant to lead you safely home to the Shepherd of souls. Just as a pastor of sheep carries both a gentle staff and a violent rod, I would be unfaithful to the Word of God if we didn’t look at the easy and the hard passages that touch on this topic.

Parents, know that if you have a baby or infant who dies, the answer is instant heaven. I hope this book helps you walk through this impossible time, and that God uses this horrible event for your good and his glory.

For Ministers

Pastors and ministers, I’m praying that you’re reading this out of curiosity, not out of necessity. But I know there is a reasonable chance you’re reading because you need answers. If you need immediate answers, Appendix 1 – Funeral Template will give you a sermon outline that you can put to work right now, and Appendix 2 – For the Minister will help to prepare your heart for the task ahead. Ideally, you’ll have time to consider and wrestle with God’s Word long before you need it, and may it be that you never need it.

The reason why many fail in battle is because they wait until the hour of the battle. The reason why others succeed is because they have gained their victory on their knees long before the battle came. Anticipate your battles, fight them on your knees before temptation comes, and you will always have victory. ~ R. A. Torrey

God is faithful and he will give us the words to speak in our hour of need. Seek to shine his light in dark places and he will establish your steps.

Scriptural Depth

While this book will go deeper than most on this subject, it will not go as deep as possible; I still want it to be readable and accessible, so we won’t delve into languages unless necessary and we won’t consider all of the different historical interpretations of each passage. But, we will grieve with God’s saints who have walked through this tragedy and learn to love God in all circumstances, because he is using our current sufferings to prepare us for eternity.

As I researched and wrote this book, I came to realize just how many times the Bible speaks to this subject. Some chapters stretched me beyond my breaking point and brought me to tears, especially “When the Death of a Child is a Blessing.” The chapter on “Babylonian Babies” started out as a one-page appendix and grew to the longest chapter in the book, which should probably be two chapters. God has a lot to say about and teach us through the suffering and pain of losing an infant.

I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us (Romans 8:18), and we do not grieve as those who have no hope (1 Thessalonians 4:13), but our current suffering is intense and we do grieve, but we grieve with an eye on heaven, knowing that God will someday wipe away every tear.

Until that day, be assured that there are no rogue molecules in this universe, and that God is accomplishing his purposes perfectly, he knows your baby by name, and know that your baby is part of his story of redemption, as has been seen by far too many people throughout history.